Ha ha! That was good. Like Paul said, it depends on how far it is, if it's a very isolated place like the desert, you want to bring two (2) 5gal. jerry cans of gas (@$3 a gal) plus the gas to get there (it starts adding up), a good variety of food including granola bars and other dry snacks, lots of bottled water per person plus soda or juice, spare parts, tent, sleeping bag, etc. The main expense is the gas to get there and back, and food.
Also, I'll take you up on the offer to get into the Orange County fair. When can you do it?